Why I Coach

This past week while scrolling on Facebook, I came across the following post from Football of Kentucky DBA:

· I am a coach because… “I’m a coach because of the kids and the passion I have for the game and sport itself. There is no better feeling than teaching a child the importance of discipline, hard work, teamwork, dedication, determination and the heart it takes to win not only in sports but in life”. – Bill Pingitor

I read and reread this post multiple times and realized that this was the exact reason that I coached only I’m not sure if I really knew that at the time.

I coached youth sports for over 25 years and stayed coaching well after my children aged out and were no longer playing and people would continually ask me why I continued to coach? Well, the first answer I gave was always that I had a passion for both soccer and baseball, and I enjoyed coaching and teaching so I didn’t see a reason to give it up. Additionally, I enjoyed watching children get better and improve. Watching children who at the beginning of a season could not master basic skills, but by the end they were mastering multiple skills, always put a smile on my face.

Now admittedly, the last seven years I coached six and seven-year-old boys, and coaching a bunch of rambunctious six and seven-year-olds is a bit of a misnomer; however, I did my best to instill discipline, hard work, dedication and determination in each and every one of them. While some of them caught onto what I was saying immediately, it others took a little longer to receive the message but by the end of the season most of the boys understood what I was trying to tell them.

Before each season, I would have a meeting with the parents and players I would explain that playing a sport was a privilege not a right. I explained to the boys that they needed to have discipline at home, in school and at practice/games and if they couldn’t behave in those three places that would be an issue. I explained to them that discipline was the most important thing that any athlete can have. Now, it might seem to some people a bit much to discuss with 6- and 7-year-old boys and to my surprise, most of them would continually tell me how they were doing in school and at home and whether or not they were behaving at home and in class (this information was usually volunteered by the children and told to me without prompting…LOL).

During practices, I would discuss how discipline on the soccer field would lead to discipline in the classroom and in life and would help them to be better students and to do well in life. Again, I was never sure they understood what I was telling them until one day one of the parents came up to me after practice and told me how much better her son was doing in school and she credited that to what I was telling them to practice. Now whether what I was saying to the boys actually helped or not I really have no idea, but I was very happy to hear what the parent told regarding her child’s improvement in school and it made me feel that I was on the right track.

To this day, some of my favorite moments are when I run into former players, some who are now married with their own children, and having them tell me how good they are doing in life. They tell me about their jobs and relationships, and in some cases that they are now coaching their own children and how much fun they are having (and how difficult it is to coach… LOL) while others share with me how they are doing in school and what they hope to do in the future. The moments that I really enjoy the most are when they tell me that they are trying to impart the same lessons to the children that they are coaching that I tried to impart to them almost 30 years ago. Discussing the importance of doing well in school and how discipline; hard work; team effort; dedication and determination, are all important for you to succeed in life.

Discipline; hard work; team effort; dedication and determination, are all words that describe what you need to do in your daily life to succeed. Let’s face it, most of the children that we coach are never going to play a sport beyond 13 years old. Yes, some children may go on to play a sport (or sports) in high school, and fewer still may go to college and play a sport and a very, very select few will go on to play a sport at the professional level meaning that the great majority will end up living day-to-day lives working and raising families so, the lessons that we teach them at an early age will be beneficial for them in their personal and professional lives.

I truly feel that we need to get away from the “winning and losing” aspect of youth sports, especially at the younger ages, and get much closer to what Mr. Pingitor is saying in his post. Let’s coach for the love of the game and the importance of teaching discipline, hard work, team effort, dedication, determination and the heart to win. Let’s work on building character in our young children and teach them that the benefits of playing a youth sport are more than “winning” and “losing”. The benefits that children learn playing youth sports include building lifelong friendships, learning how to deal with adversity, learning how to deal with people and situations and developing leadership qualities. Children are going to spend most of their lives in “winning and losing situations” whether they be work or personal, so let’s stop putting pressure on them at earlier and earlier ages, and let’s make life, and youth sports fun and use them as teachable moments.